I nearly drowned today.
Well, nearly nearly drowned. It was close. And all my fault really, I stuffed up and I suffered for it. But the thing was, the entire time I was being bashed around by waves my thoughts were...really kinda empty. None of this life flashing before your eyes or thinking about how to live etc. All I could think was 'Shit, there's ANOTHER wave?! *sigh*' and 'This is why people drown.'
It was only after, when I stopped to think on it, that I realised how close a call it was and how I could have been one of those people.
What happened? Well, today I was on a patrol away from my Dad so he instructed me I was to go for a swim. A guy agreed to go out with me and off we went. There was a strong undertow- a current pulling you sideways into a rip further down the beach- and big waves so it wasn't the best of conditions. But the pair of us got out beyond the waves, out the back where it was nice and calm. We came back in and the guy with me asked if I wanted to go out again. I said yes.
Bad decision. We waited in the breaking line for a big set to pass and I was barely able to stand up, the undertow was so strong. Then he said to go for it and we did. Three or so waves later he was halfway there and I hadn't moved.
Then I dived under a wave but not deep enough and I got smashed. I kept my head and swam to the surface, took a breath but then there was another wave. I went under it but I couldn't hold onto the sand and I got smashed around again. This time I didn't make it to the surface straight away but I still kept calm and waited until I could get up.
I barely got a breath this time before the third wave hit me. I let it- well, I say let but by now I knew this was a situation where I had no control and all I had to do was keep getting breaths- take me forwards until I could sorta stand and begin to make my way in. I got smashed a couple more times but nothing as bad as those first three, where I was dragged further under and could feel myself being tossed around.
That feeling is one I cannot accurately describe. It's horrific, it's terrifying and I can easy see why someone caught in it would panic. Of course, someone who panics, breathes in. And drowns.
I nearly panicked. And after my taste of it today, I'm extraordinarily sure that I do not ever want to drown. It is by far, the worse way I can imagine to die.
On a side note, there were also whales in the surf today. Very very cool.
